Staring at the pieces of a white puzzle…

Sabine’s note: The following is a reflection sent to me by a student and happy graduate from the 2022-23 cohort, Paige Barnes. Here is a LINK TO HER MOST RECENT NEWSLETTER (with information on her upcoming retreat “Body of Stars”) and here is HER WEBSITE. Check out her work if you are curious now, and let it inspire your own creativity….And if you now want to join the 2023-24 cohort, here is the INFORMATION PAGE that includes the link to the Admissions Survey. Enrollment is open until we start on September 14, 2023.

During the Triple Crown, under the leadership and guidance of Sabine Wilms, I read and translated excerpts of classical texts by philosophers such as Confucius, Zhuangzi, Laozi, Sun Simiao and foundational texts such as Huang Di Nei Jing Su Wen and Ling Shu and the Nan Jing.

Why did I take Sabine’s program?

I signed up to have an authentic connection with the origins of a medicine that has and is profoundly impacting the course of my life. I signed up to study with Sabine Wilms because her program is grounded in research, knowledge, wisdom, and most importantly 神 shén.

What was the experience like?

I felt like I was trying to solve a puzzle of white while studying Classical Chinese language. It asked for time, observation, and patience. It asked me to consider a different way of viewing and contemplating both text and concepts about living. I felt disoriented and uncomfortable and at the same time inspired and moved. I felt connected to life beyond what is obviously seen. I felt connected to mystery.

How have I benefited?

Considering that I began the course with minimal Chinese language skills, now I have a framework, a guide, on how to approach translating a classical text. Using the skills learned to translate, I can reflect on the meaning and have conversations with colleagues about how to potentially apply the ideas. Taking the course gave me agency as a person and as a practitioner to engage and reflect on the philosophy with intellectual honesty.

And how am I now applying these skills concretely?

As the adage goes, the more you know the more you realize how much you don’t know. This is how I feel right now. The more I study Chinese medicine, the body of knowledge expands. Tangibly, reading Laozi inspired a creative practice that I incorporated into a winter retreat. With a calligraphy brush, I created a unique symbol belonging to each yin organ. This symbol illustrated a participant’s path during the day of the retreat. It was like a trail guide. I envisioned it as their Dao of the day. Also, one of my favorite lectures was about the ghost points from Sun Simiao. Shortly after translating this lesson, a patient came in for care after falling. She said to me, “I know this might sound strange, but when I fell, I felt like a ghost pushed me.” That does not sound strange at all! I thought. To apply the ghost points as actually written in the protocol is extreme and requires further mentorship. However, I did hold the ideas as a guide and envisioned extracting unwanted ghosts from her tissue.

Over the course of the year, I gained a greater understanding of what my strengths are and how to respect Chinese medicine. I’m greatly inspired by its philosophy and master teachers, like Sabine Wilms. I apply the principles I’ve learned as a fusion from influential teachers in the field of both Chinese medicine and Western contemporary dance and somatic practices. How I apply medicine is in response to a life that is unique to me, and that uniqueness has meaningful value in the care that I provide. As I move forward and learn further, I will continue to stare at the pieces of the white puzzle and contemplate life and how to live and care for myself and others with tender reverence for its mystery. As the beloved late Mary Oliver asks, “Tell me, what is it you plan to do. With your one wild and precious life?”